Slow authors pt 2

Truly horrific? I do not think you have gauged the full value of metafiction.

It allows you to put your writer in your shoes - especially the kind one would use to walk through volcanic fields.

And then dump him headfirst in the fields.

Just you can't do that when your author's a vindictive little bitch - or bastard - who'd happily turn you into a prize exhibit for the adage "things could always be worse" if you pulled something like that.

It is no different for me. I get to start my stories with a hangover.

So?

On the average, there are a hundred stories a month that are thrown away.

Wait a minute! No there aren't!

All in the name of a good tall tale, yes?

Would you prefer being left hanging in a dozen really bad situations at once, for months, if not years, because your author isn't up to paying attention for long enough to write you out of any of them?

Sir. I am there.

I want to see the famous Varus fanfics.

Stories with my author in them get weird fast. I don't think they'd make particularly amusing telling. Eeeexcept that one where I slashed Mutt with Simon, but from the reaction that engendered, even I don't dare.

*is very, very quiet*

*snort*
Amateur authors are disgusting, and that's that!
They come up with people, throw them into messes, but then "ah, I have no time to write", or no ideas, or they realise they are not good enough, and what happens to their characters, they just don't care.
Bunch of idiots.