Random Encounter chat 09

*Attempts to sneak up on Sebastian. Is carrying a clean, empty plate.*

*Lets it happen.*

*snags his hat for herself and puts the plate on his head*

Oh. I'm well-plated now. Also, you look dashing in that. Marry me now. *g*

Hmm... Not without a better idea of what I'd be getting into. *Is smiling. Is treating it as a joke. Is not jumping in head first into the joke, because that's not one that should spiral out of control. Is, however, rather flirtatious just now.*

The story of my life. *sigh* Oh well, I did try. It's not often someone pretty and empathic comes my way and doesn't want to smack me on the head with a plate -- all the time.

You know, I really want to warn you. This fuckwit of a man has no sense of responsibility. Don't encourage him. He'll be in your pants in a jiffy.

Sounds good to me.

Sebs: *blinks without a single change in expression otherwise*

Helmine: ****, ****, ****?!

I'm not sure if your pants would look as good on me, though, but you're welcome to try mine.

Maybe we should find a room so we can swap clothes without an audience. :)

I think this plan has merit. Shall we?

*slips an arm around his waist and walks him off*

*looks at Helmine*

Would you like a stiff grog?

...

How about we skip the watered-down rum and just go for the rum. Lots of it. After we get rid of my kirschwasser.

Want some black forest cake with the kirschwasser?

...what's the big deal, anyway?

Hm. Yeah, sure. Thanks, pint-sized fount of goodies.

Big deal? I just hate it when he gets laid all the time, settles down and then runs off to another fucking adventure, leaving behind broken hearts.

That ass.

*gets cake and plates and forks*

Ah, that. Well, I figure it's watch and wait. Maybe she runs off first.

You kidding me? He always escapes first. From what I've heard -- and seen, for myself.

Oh, well. In that case I'll just hope for not much heartbreak. Or a chance to catch her on the rebound, whatever. *g*

...sometimes, you little squirt, I wonder why I like you sometimes. Must be all the booze. Also, you seem like the kind of person to leave a note to the pessimist and optimist arguing over whether or not the cup is half-full or half-empty. I'd be you note would: "Thanks for the free drink, signed -- Opportunist."

*laughs* If they've been annoying me a lot, yes, to shut them up. Otherwise, just ask if it's important.

You know what? One day we should go kick ass somewhere. You do the thinking, I'll do the kicking.

*considers for a moment* That'd either be a disaster, or awesome, or both. *g*

I like disasters. I usually walk away from them smoking a cigarette.

Siri: Well, Sylvie is a grown woman and she's been warned. And I think they're pretty cute.

Weft: *sighs dreamily, embroidering something tiny, pink, silken and lacy. I hope that's just a handkerchief. Or an antimacassar or something. Please let it be a - yes, handkerchief. Thank all the dogs for that.*

*stares at the both of them.*

Cute or not, he's just bad luck for everyone.

*glares at Weft, bristling*

You're so cute when you worry about people having their lives ruined by your father. <3

It's hatred disguised as altruism. That seems to work everywhere.

Anyway, I love you too, you fuckwit.

I'm more comfortable with hatred, Miss Helmine, so don't put yourself out on my account.

Strangely, he's never ruined my life...

You just wait, assmaster.

You did nothing wrong, ma'am. It wasn't your fault.

A gunshot wound to your face would be.

Can't we just all get along? :(

*edges closer to Nico and lowers his head* What's an assmaster?

*explains in vivid detail just like a teacher*

Sorry, assmaster. Good ears.

*shoves the door open with his head*

HEY LADIES! Are you hungry for meat? I've got something to give you! *wagwagwag goes the tail, thumpthumpthump audible through the door*


((but seriously, what is an assmaster, or more precisely, which type does she mean... *g*))

Dog. Food.

((Chutney ferret..))

Yes! I caught it myself! *disappears*

*drag drag drag*

*deposits a deceased stag in front of them, smiling hugely, tail a-whir*

*shocked mumbling to himself* I'm... not a brother entertainer... and who by grace do you think I would want to... Never mind. Not even going to ask.


((I guessed as much. Details, we want details! ... *brief vote* OK, the majority do not want details.))

OK, I'm impressed.

*is talking about Basaltine's catch*

*and, seen close up, he does indeed have blood on his muzzle...*

I know, I know, it's huge. Would you like a taste? I normally let Weft prepare my meat; he's good with his hands. But you're welcome to grab hold.

I have to side with Nico. That's impressive. Maybe you ought to be the grill?

*Scratches head, staring at Basaltine, wondering what exactly she's hearing there. Feels rusty-brained.*

I could try cooking, but my skills run more to the "set fire to the whole thing" school of cuisine.

No, I meant that you provide the fire and I step on your tail if it's too cold or hot. And woe betide if you don't figure out which it is.

Saved for the interested. I believe the first comment was a reaction to http://profusion.hellhound.net/cgi-bin/show.cgi?tpc=1453&post=14623#POST14623 but it may have been some other post thereabouts

[19:08] <Anke> What a cute little maniac
[19:08] <Sebastian> ...I'm cute?
[19:09] <Anke> Seen through the fourth wall, yes.
[19:09] <Sebastian> Not cute. I was cute when I was six years old. Then I got worse.
[19:11] <Sylvie> Definitely cute. Particularly when concussed, worried, or otherwise befuddled.
[19:11] <Sebastian> ...
[19:12] * Sebastian looks utterly, utterly confused.*
[19:12] * Sylvie fails at failing to grin.
[19:12] <Sebastian> ...
[19:13] * Sylvie kisses the tip of his nose.
[19:13] <Argilla> Well, that... is something. You managed to silence the person whose glibness is legendary. My dear, I curtsie, bow and do want to commend you.
[19:13] * Sebastian blue screens.
[19:13] <Argilla> ...oh dear.
[19:14] <Sylvie> Stories tend to be larger than life, I hear.
[19:14] <Argilla> Ah. He said that to you, did he?
[19:14] <Sylvie> Among other people.
[19:15] * Argilla considers Sylvie for a while.
[19:15] <Argilla> So. You believe him to actually be honest, if I am not mistaken?
[19:16] * Sylvie waves a hand in front of his eyes.
[19:17] <Sylvie> That's a tricky question. For what it's worth, I suppose this right now is an act.
[19:18] * Sebastian just stares.
[19:18] * Argilla stares, too, but in a knowing manner.
[19:18] <Argilla> You know, you may just be medicine through and through, young lady.
[19:20] * Sylvie looks confused.
[19:20] <Sebastian> ...I think... I need a drink.
[19:21] * Argilla grins ferally.
[19:21] * Nico hands him a bottle of plum wine.
[19:22] * Sylvie has no clue what's going on and hopes she didn't say something wrong.

*clasps his hands and goes aww. Never quite stopped casting moderately nervous looks at Miss Sylvie, though*

So, am I reading this right: Mimi worries Sebastian breaks Sylvie's heart, Weft worries Sylvie breaks Sebastian's heart?

Fat chance of anyone breaking his heart.

I'm just nervous of Miss Sylvie, but please don't let on to her about that.

I could help with interrogation. I've been conditioned to withstand it. A lot of the techniques are reversible.

I'm curious about the reason why you're nervous, but I'm not sure this is the right place to talk about it. If you want to at all. :)

Don't think he does. I just want to shoot daddykins.

... if Snog hadn't talked about retiring Sebastian, I might like to see what happens...

No reasons you don't already know about.