Eluding death (monk-induced) part 2...

Nico *looks a bit puzzled*: If he'd try that "I'm going to kill you, but first you squirm a bit, hur hur" routine on me, yes. You were the one who suggested distraction.
Admittedly, the statistical sample I can work from is rather small, but so far in my experience it works more often than not.

Suitov: Distraction from violence by initiating violence? Hmm. [seems to consider this]

Oh, while I think of it, one more thing. If he ever screams at you that he's going to kill you, or sobs or snaps or rants it, or even pronounces it with quiet glee, a murderous attempt is probably NOT imminent.

I still wouldn't bet your life on it, but.

It seems they're taught to avoid killing in hot blood when reasonably possible. One of the few points on which we agree...

Nico: Yeah, when you end up in hot blood somehow, your first worry should be getting out of it before you get cooked.

*looks at Suitov suspiciously*

Suitov: Nicely put. *is being looked at suspiciously...?*

Nico *shrugs; is going to chalk up the idea of Suitov betting her life on anything on a language weirdness*

Hmph. First and only time I let anyone drag me to a black pudding festival. I don't like the stuff, anyway.

Suitov: What on shaded earth is black pudding? Do I want to know?

[Oh, but he meant just that: he wouldn't bet her life on it. (He has gambled his own life a few times against his knowledge of Weft's skewed psychology, but considers that his own risk.)]

Nico: Sausage based on blood rather than meat, though it can contain meat as a filler, too.
Did you want to know?

[The thought went something on the lines of "If he points out that he would not bet her life on this, it means that generally speaking he would be willing to bet her life on something, without consulting her first. Not good.]

Suitov: Not humanoid blood? [would be thinking of covering Jaina's ears at this point]

[He might well bet her life on other things. He isn't giving me a serious answer.]

Nico: Not officially, but, well, with sausage there are always those not-quite-jokes on the lines of "you don't want to know what really is in there". *grins good-humouredly*

[He should pick wisely and/or not get caught, then. :P]

Suitov: I had heard some similar culinary horror stories from Weft's fast food career. I admit, I always thought he was exaggerating.

[For clarity's sake, of course, I mean bet not as in "game of chance", but as in "take risks". You want to play dice, ask Basaltine instead. *g*]

Nico: At least that stuff was deep fried, wasn't it?

Suitov: Have to admit I wasn't paying all that much attention. I remember something about uni-- no, rats, wasn't it? Or their equivalent?

Apparently among some of the staff there was a bit of a weekend game to see what they could sneak into the salads. You'd have to ask the twineball.

Nico: Did you know that story about someone eating something with a cockroach in it, and then having cockroaches breed in their stomach?

Suitov: I heard one about accidentally inhaling a firefly and being cursed ever after with twenty-watt sneezes.

Nico: If that was "glowing" rather than "electric shocks", that might be useful...

Basaltine: I want glowing phlegm1!!11!

Weft: EWWW

Nico: That'd be even more useful, assuming it stays glowy for a bit. Rather gross, but, hey, if you're stuck somewhere without light, glowing snot would be an asset.

Weft: That's sick.

Basaltine: Oh come on. Snot's natural. Respect the snot. Love the gunk.

Siri: It's natural and nothing either to freak out about or to be proud of, ya babies.

Basaltine: [to Flanders and Swann's tune] Crud, crud, glorious crud...

Siri: Y'know, considering that in excess it's usually a sign of your breathing system being irritated, perhaps a different glowing bodily secretion would be more comfortable and conveni--

Weft: Hst! Do not want to hear this!

Siri: Oh, sorry.

Basaltine: And you're the guy who happily wades through trails of blood?

Weft: What's your poiiiint?