They Never Drink Wine/Vampires

So, now that my connection is finally sort of stable...

This was an off-hand comment that vaguely ballooned into an AU, very much non-canon-anything short story idea. It's about vampires. Everyone loves vampires. Vampires are cool and tragically hip, and everyone knows they're also very scary and serious business. Characters we know and love as vampires would be scarier still.

So let's toss 'em in one of those gothic castles everyone is always talking about and have them Never Drink Wine. That there's at least a century worth of hilarious pop culture to mock is just an added bonus.

(Come on. Weftpire! How can you resist?)

Wheeeheehee. I've got a fair few ideas for this.

Anyone up for writing a Head Bitch Vampire sort of role? (My characters aren't. I prefer them scheming for the position.)

As for the details of this Random Unexplained Vampirism, I'm clichéing it up with mine, but anything non-copyright-infringing goes. :)

:/

Honestly, I don't really have any ideas, and I'm kinda worried that if I throw someone in there I at some point stop dead without any idea to go. I'll keep an eye on the discussion, and might enter with Xan, but I'm not sure yet.

I could maybe offer a vampirised!somecharacter as a Head Vampire type figure. We'll need to flesh out more of the premise, though, so I can have a feel of what it is I'm supposed to do with him/her/hrm. We can't have the Head Vampire just go "Uh, now that you're all here... have some, uh, biscuits," and withdraw into the Head Vampire Tower.

I think I'll be doing something classically vampiric. Maybe not that Romanian one-nostril-only rise-out-of-grave-and-shamble type thing, though.

Oh, I'm purely after someone Icypoo can resent and plot and scheme against. (Not necessarily successfully plot, naturally.) Bonus points if it's a hawt woman, but anything goes.

My vague notion is of one of these deals where the parent vampire has some measure of control over the offspring, but not total, such that the offspring (if that way inclined) might be tempted to off the parent and usurp des power. Simply because I need some reason to keep Ice close by and frustrated.

Weft is not a problem.

Premise and plot, I'll think more about.

Surely the head vampire couldn't be a fanboy/girl/creature trying to make an immortal eye-candy collection? That would indeed be very crackish... and I'd like my brain to stop insisting it could really work as a dark and slick and angsty storyline really it could, thanks.

Hehe, ok, real idea! What if the head is after the secret of immortality?

Not vampirism, not that shadow of an existence with the flaming porphyria and the strange haemoglobin dependencies. Real, eternal life. Vampirism was merely a means to that end. A temporary state. After all, the secret of immortality probably takes more than a mortal lifetime to acquire. And then there'll be the added problem of how to cure the vampirism first, but one step at a time.

So perhaps de collected a few talented souls, bit them to make them undying and conveniently subservient and set them to helping. A mage, obviously valuable. (Of course, the fact that said mage promptly lost all his magic with the death of his flesh was a snag someone really should have foreseen, but he can still read and research.) Thieves, cutthroats and whatnot, always useful. Ex-vampire-slayers if you can get them, especially ones with a handy teleport power.

I can well imagine the boss sending des Super-Duper Vampire Squad out on missions to grab something-or-other, and for the rest of the time... lurking, biting people, squabbling and bitching? And not drinking wine, of course.

Now all that's missing is a fool who plays that boss...

*shrug* Only my first idea. It could be that nobody has a character to suit. Still open to more suggestions.

The search-for-immortality thing could definitely work. It might have more motion, because there's something specific and presumably goal-oriented going on instead of everyone just lounging around in search of tea and biscuits. But I sekritly like the harem-of-pretty idea. First, it's an utterly and totally dysfunctional setting (in the good way, i.e. for the characters). It's also intrinsically character-based, a patented vampire thing, and quite frankly just hilarious.

I'm thinking combine and conquer. Even in a relatively closed setting, which presumably makes for a shorter and more compact story, I'm sure almost any character would still get to do their Thing (tm).

Whoever has Big Boss under their wing is probably going to set the tone for where things are going. I'd volunteer immediately if I had a character ready and waiting. But otherwise, right now Imp is vampirism candidate number 1.

What came to my mind with the "collecting pretty vampires" was someone there being a stickler for appearances and complaining to anyone who doesn't behave proper for a vampire?

Other than that I'm not going to be writing sex scenes with mine (though I'm perfectly happy for them to be sexually harassed), I'm game for either approach. Being a Vampyre Lorde in a Bigge Gawthick Castle certainly implies a liking for showiness.

Sure. Vampire school should work for great for me. I mean, just look at who we're dealing with. There's bound to be a few whose actions are just eating into the Big Boss. (No pun inten... oh, well, okay.)

How long have they been vampires? I've been thinking of quite a few years, possibly decades/centuries - long enough for frustration to set in, resentments to fester and research to progress. Or we can go with a shorter time, though let's at least give them a few months so they've got used to their new (vulner)abilities.

I haven't heard back from Ree in several days, but it looks as though she has a lot on her plate in RL stuff. Let's proceed for now on the basis that she might or might not be participating.

I'm thinking as long enough as the plot/writer's vision/circumstances require. Vamp!Imp I'm envisioning as youngish, because I want to play up her exploring her powers. But generally I'm thinking long enough so they're comfortable with the whole thing and, to some extent, each other.

Of course, there should be room for "Omg woe is me, I am vampire, I can not has cheezburger!" if anyone wants to do it.

Cool kidneybeans. In that case, I know what I'm doing with my two. Subject to a few other details, of course.

Anyone know if Snawg is/would be interested? I do know the term time of ebil has begun.

I'm tempted to say let's shared-NPC the big bad, but I'd prefer not to.

I'm still mentally on the lookout for maybe at least one additional writer. But I'd also like to get this off the ground.

I'm also sorta leery about sharing the Head Vampire. But we might be running out of alternatives.

*nods* I forgot to say - I heard from Ree and she doesn't think she'll have time in the foreseeable. Which is a shame, because vampires are rather tailored to her interests.